Greta totally makes sense.
This is Laura Mesrobian. She’s an actor and a server in New York City, where she’s waited on a bunch of celebrities.
Courtesy of Laura Mesrobian
From actors to politicians, here are some of the stars she’s served:
Jake Gyllenhaal: “Yes, he’s fucking gorgeous. Yes, his eyes will pierce your soul. But, kind of whiney. Really likes Pinot Noir and french fries. Always has friends. Somehow never paid, but he was pretty fun. 7/10.”
Nbc / NBCU Photo Bank / NBCUniversal via
Greta Gerwig: “A true queen. Dude, this girl was so fun. She had just finished her pregnancy at the time and given birth to her kid. She talked to me for like two minutes at the bar about how much her tits had changed. Totally would wanna party with her all night. Just a super good presence in the room. 11/10.”
Matt Winkelmeyer / Getty Images
Noah Baumbach: “With Miss Gerwig comes another person. Mr. Squid and the Whale. Jeff didn’t match the vibes of Miss Gerwig. Didn’t seem like he was having any fun. Kind of see how Noah Baumbach would make Marriage Story. 4/10.”
Rich Fury / Getty Images
Julianne Moore: “Beautiful, classy, and sweet. One of the few celebrities to look you in the eye and say, ‘Thank you.’ Great skin. Really tiny. Joy overall. 8/10.”
Vittorio Zunino Celotto / Getty Images
Glenn Close: “Regal, composed. Some people had thought of it as cold, but I don’t think so. She’d probably dealt with a lot of people by this time, so give her a break. With Glenn Close always came [her dog], Pip. Pip had full reign to run around the restaraunt as much as he wanted. Not the most fun, but the dog was pretty funny, and it was overall okay. 7/10.”
Albert L. Ortega / Getty Images
Frances McDormand: “All she said to me was, ‘Are you our waitress? Because we need alcohol right now.’ 9/10.”
Kevin Winter / Getty Images
Amanda Seyfried: “Came in on a super busy night with her husband, but was really sweet and super understanding. Got a cheese board. Overall pretty great, so 8/10.”
Jason Merritt / Getty Images
Dakota Fanning: “Seems like a really normal person. Met a girlfriend there, split a bottle of wine. Solid tipper. Can’t complain. 7/10.”
Presley Ann / Getty Images
Hillary Clinton: “It was post-election. She had been through it. I was thinking maybe she’d want red wine or something relaxing. Hillary Clinton was drinking tequila sodas. 9/10 for drink choice. 2/10 for war hawk policies.”
Chip Somodevilla / Getty Images
Note: Laura said she couldn’t take credit for serving Hillary, it was her friend.
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